Fix data race in tunnel_set/receiver_set and establish call data (#5650)

[ti-chi-bot]

This is an automated cherry-pick of #5650

What problem does this PR solve?

Issue Number: ref #5095, close #5651

Problem Summary:

• Data race in tunnel_set/receiver_set:
  In Some refinements of mpp_exchange_receiver_map and MPPTunnelSet #5132, it try to use the atomic variable status to protect tunnel_set/receiver_set in multiple thread read/write(MPPTask::runImpl thread to write and MPPTask::abort thread to read):
  

  tiflash/dbms/src/Flash/Mpp/MPPTask.cpp

  Lines 145 to 147 in b6536f6

  	if (status != INITIALIZING)
  	throw Exception(fmt::format("The tunnel {} can not be registered, because the task is not in initializing state", tunnel->id()));
  	tunnel_set->registerTunnel(MPPTaskId{task_meta.start_ts(), task_meta.task_id()}, tunnel);

  
  Unfortunately, it turns out not working becase the value of status can be changed after L145 and before L147
• Data race in establish call data:
  

  tiflash/dbms/src/Flash/EstablishCall.cpp

  Lines 106 to 113 in b6536f6

  	void EstablishCallData::writeErr(const mpp::MPPDataPacket & packet)
  	{
  	state = ERR_HANDLE;
  	if (write(packet))
  	err_status = grpc::Status::OK;
  	else
  	err_status = grpc::Status(grpc::StatusCode::UNKNOWN, "Write error message failed for unknown reason.");
  	}

  
  After write(packet) in L109, the call data is put back to completion queue, and it can be deleted anytime, so there is a chance that before executing L110, the call data itself has been deleted.

What is changed and how it works?

• Add lock to protect tunnel_set and receiver_set
• Don't access the member variable after write(packet), since write(packet) always return true, just set err_status to OK before write(packet)

Check List

Tests

• Unit test
• Integration test
• Manual test (add detailed scripts or steps below)
  run random failpoint tests
• No code

Side effects

• Performance regression: Consumes more CPU
• Performance regression: Consumes more Memory
• Breaking backward compatibility

Documentation

• Affects user behaviors
• Contains syntax changes
• Contains variable changes
• Contains experimental features
• Changes MySQL compatibility

Release note

None

[ti-chi-bot]

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[ti-chi-bot]

@ti-chi-bot: This cherry pick PR is for a release branch and has not yet been approved by release team.
Adding the do-not-merge/cherry-pick-not-approved label.

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